Carving out moments of solitude in this fast-paced and competitive world is crucial for our well-being. It is easy to lose track of ourselves if we don’t spend quality time alone. Ideally, it's best to be alone with no outside distractions and no “other people” distractions. When you take this time to be alone, you can let go of the daily stresses of life, think more clearly, and be present with yourself. This is not just a practice; it's an essential act of self-love, a way to value and care for yourself. 

When alone, we can tune into that still, quiet inner voice. This process of listening, reflecting, and asking questions gives us insights. If we are in a natural setting, connecting with nature's beauty is both rejuvenating and healing. 

Spending time alone alleviates overwhelm. You gain awareness because you can step back and look at what is going on in your life and choose what you want to let go of and what you want to keep or do more of. You become aware of tasks or activities taking up your time and energy that aren't truly important that you could let go of. 

For some, being alone and letting go can be frightening. The world puts pressure on us to achieve and be successful. Letting go seems counter-intuitive, yet it is only in letting go that we can move forward in a healthy direction.

Over the years, we've picked up many behaviors and habits that no longer serve us and shouldn’t dictate our lives—like people-pleasing or overworking. You might also fear getting close to others or needing to always be in control. Stepping back and reflecting allows you to reconnect with yourself, renew, and replenish. You gain insights and inspiration for the healthy direction you need to move toward. Remember, we are not here to please others but to seek and live our calling or our purpose. This is where we will experience our greatest joy.

REST is an integral part of this practice

As you rest, you can let go. You have nothing to prove, nothing you have to do. You choose what you want to do because you care for and listen to your body and the messages it sends you.

It is good to ponder whether your needs are being met. Ask yourself: what are your desires, dreams, and visions for your life now and your future?

This time alone might seem selfish to some, but it’s not. It’s imperative in this day and age of busyness, striving, worry, comparisons, competition, and financial fears. Let go of guilt because when you are at peace with yourself, others around you usually benefit. You cannot love others if you do not love yourself. Burnout and stress are the result. 

You might also fear getting close to others or needing to always be in control. Stepping back and reflecting allows you to reconnect with yourself, renew, and replenish. You gain insights and inspiration for the healthy direction you must move toward. Remember, we are not here to please others but to seek and live our calling. This is where we will experience our greatest joy.

TIME is also a part of this practice

While an hour here or there is always good, I encourage unplugging from work and stressful activities at least weekly. You may have significant responsibilities at work, at home with children, aging, or health-compromised family members. To handle these responsibilities wisely and without exhaustion, it is vital to unplug and replenish regularly. Hal Elrod, the author of “Miracle Mornings,” recommends spending alone time every morning as it sets you up in a positive way for the rest of the day. It is an excellent habit to start to spend this time alone. If mornings are impossible for you, start wherever and whenever you can, but start; your well-being is worth it. He suggests 10-minute meditation and 10-minute journaling (these suggestions are a part of his S.A.V.O.R.S. practice).

Spending time in the beauty of nature is a powerful way to let go and connect. Consider going on a nature trek, renting a cottage on a lake, or going to the beach, completely unplugging from all computers and phones.

Spending time alone might seem scary to some as they need distractions, and being alone doesn’t feel safe. That's something to look at. Start in smaller increments and work on how to have a relationship with your higher power. Try to make some movement towards this connection and relationship. Try to let go of your fearful thoughts and be open to a higher perspective, a larger perspective. The more relaxed, safe, and confident you become in letting go of the busyness and being with yourself, the more you will feel satisfied in every aspect of your life. If it is hard for you to let go, I suggest you try EFT-Tapping to move any emotion in the way of you being more relaxed and present.

Journaling

Journaling is a powerful self-help tool that allows you to sort out your feelings, desires, and dreams. 

When you are rested and ready, ask yourself some questions to meditate and journal about. At times, it is helpful to look at your goals and where you are headed for the next few months, a year, and longer. Do you need to make adjustments? I encourage you to write your answers in your journal. Writing them out by hand helps your brain remember and sparks your creativity. Using the keyboard can be as effective for some, but for this particular exercise, if you don't want to open your computer, you can handwrite your answers. You can also make a voice recording if that helps. Write a few sentences or as much as you want for each question. Dr. Ira Progoff, PhD, a psychologist and author who developed the "Intensive Journal Method," devoted his life to exploring new ways to encourage creativity and enhance individual growth. He said, “Man does indeed know intuitively more than he rationally understands. Dialoguing with God, your Higher Power, your internal Self-Helper, or any other expression of your inner wisdom can be a beautiful, spiritual, lyrical experience.” You can also use this dialoguing in your journaling. I have done it for years with profound results.

1. Before you begin, take ten deep breaths, notice what's happening in your body, and try to release any tension.

2. Write three words about how you feel at the top of the page.

3. Choose a specific goal, feeling, emotion, part of you, or person.

How do I feel about  ……..........?

How does my body feel about ……............?

What's underneath this ........................?

What can I let go of to feel more fully alive, at peace, relaxed, energetic, etc., about this ................................?

What are the things that bring me joy, make me feel whole, and are easy for me to do (this is where your gifts and talents lie)  ..............................?

How can I bring more of that into my life ..........................?

In a perfect world, what would I like my next steps to be ...............................?

How can I be more loving and kind to myself (this is not selfish; when we are kind to ourselves, we can be kind to others) ............................?

You might have your own questions. That’s great. Maybe you are so tired that you just want to rest. Sometimes, we are so burned out that we can't even think straight, and we need to let go of the need to do anything. Allow your body to renew and refresh. Be aware of whether you are numbing out rather than letting go.

Your answers might be as simple as “to experience joy,” “change the way I run my business,” "change my job,” or “get out of this relationship.” It’s not about pleasing others or doing what you think you should. This is a time of rest, discovery, and nurturing for you. 

4. When you finish journaling, write down three words to express how you feel now.

During this Alone Time, try to switch off normal work activities and unplug from the computer. If you spend a few hours journaling and alone for a day or so, you might envision where your business or personal life will be in 5, 10, or 20 years. Switch off the daily emails and to-dos, and binge-watching streaming platforms, etc. Reading books might be a better option as this allows your to imagine and think.

If you want to know more about letting go and finding more freedom, joy, and purpose, please get in touch with me. I help people all the time to do this easily and gently. I invite you to have a complimentary 20-minute consult call with me by clicking this link: "Book a Call." I'm happy to chat with you about my work, answer any questions you might have, and see if I can help you.

Love,